July 21, 2007

Some Truly Ultimate Cage Matches

Forget those pansies that claim to be ultimate fighters, let's look into some real ultimate cage matches that would be great to watch.

1. Enormous boulder vs. Enormous tree

2. Irresistible force vs. Immovable object (Irresistible force gets a huge fan for its tag-team partner; Immovable object gets an unlimited amount of Vaseline.)

3. Jesus vs. Muhammad (Both get Righteousness for a tag-team partner.)

4. Gandhi vs. Martin Luther King, Jr. (Loser wins.)

5. College ultimate frisbee team vs. Another college ultimate frisbee team (All 14 players play Ultimate inside the cage.)

6. Apathy vs. Laziness

7. Heterosexual man vs. A nice pair of tits (Actually, this one would be over pretty fast. I'd still like to watch though.)

8. Intellect vs. Creativity

9. Socrates vs. Plato (Joke's on you guys! Ha! Socrates is dead!)

10. Fire vs. Rain (Referee is James Taylor.)

11. Doubt vs. Skepticism

12. The Beat vs. The Rhythm

13. Underhanded Sneakiness vs. Sneaky Underhandedness

14. Time vs. Reality


ShOI said...

12. Michael Bolton vs. Kenny G (We all win. By the way, I'm stealing this from Get Fuzzy).

Unknown said...

13. Black Hole vs. Another Black Hole. Actually, now that I think about it, this one would really suck.

Brendon Etter said...

Good suggestions from both. I added to the list; so your numbrs look like you can't count, but we know the truth.