How to Disarm an Attacker

Step 1. Hold up cute baby.

Step 2. Wait for attacker to say "ahhhhh".

Step 3. Throw baby into attacker's face.

Step 4. Instruct baby to chew off attacker's arms.

Step 5. Clean baby.

Step 6. Reload.

Step 7. Patiently wait in the bushes for the next attacker to come along.


(NB: Also works with fluffy kitties.)