October 27, 2006

A Play A Day #197

Five Seconds


Setting: Ron's apartment.

(Ron is seated on couch reading a magazine, a loud bump is heard offstage, then some cursing and mumbling, then we hear a door handled being jiggled and Dale say offstage)

Dale: I can't, your door's locked!

Ron: Dale?

D: It's locked!

(Ron gets up and walks offstage, before he gets there we hear Dale say)

D: I think I'm okay.

(R looks confused, exits, they come back onstage D is holding his head)

D: Well, what does it look like I did?

R: You hit your head?

D: Right outside your door, that hall light.

R: You hit it on the hall light?

D: No, I don't want to go to the hospital.

R: Hospital?

D: You don't even have your car right now.

R: Right... I forgot...

D: Because I don't feel like driving.

R: Yeah... ummm... Dale?

D: No way!

R: What? No way what?

D: I am not... what's wrong with you?

R: Nothing... uhhh...

D: Then how could I be reading your mind?

R: Reading... my? (realizing that's what it has been like since Dale entered) ohhh...

D: Sure, a Kroft Draft is pretty good, I'll have one, thanks.

R: Kroft... how did you know that I had Kroft?

D: (long pause, looking at R in a manner which indicates he is listening to him) Uh huh...

R: Wait...

D: (long pause) Right, right, I know her... yeah...

R: Who? Dale... buddy? What are you talking...

D: (laughs) That's pretty typical of her, but, hey, (moving his head toward offstage, raising his voice) you got a good beer out of the deal!

R: Are you talking about Laura... and the beer? (leaves to get a beer)

D: (calling offstage) Yeah, I've heard as much from some other folks, (pulling his head back toward the chair, quieting down) Oh yeah! That's a good tasting beer.

R: (entering with open beer bottle, hands it to D, D takes a long drink) Are you seeing everything ahead...

D: I was turning around, walking toward your door, thought I dropped something, this receipt something, and I noticed I didn't drop it... What? No...I don't know where the receipt was from... not important - so I turn around, and wham! right into one of those old... what they call it... those uhhh... sconces, right that's it, thanks. Like right in the top of my head....

R: Wow... I don't know what to say anymore... you're just not here... are you? (pause) Dale? (pause) Hello, Dale?

(lights start fading)

D: (big laugh for a while) That's so funny, Ron... yeah, that's what I'm thinking... I should have seen it coming! (laughter)

R: (shaking his head, picks up vase on side table) I gotta do this...

D: (big reaction) Hey! What the...??!!! That really hurt! Jesus! You're trying... (vase comes down on his head)

(lights out)


No comments: