Step 1. Get really fat.
Step 2. Remove feet.
Step 3. Remove legs.
Step 4. Remove arms.
Step 5. Stitch your hands back onto where your arm sockets were. This just looks funny, okay?
Step 6. Ask the first person that come along the following question: Please don't be alarmed, but could you please remove my head and then push me down a hill?
Step 7. Don't take "no" for an answer.
Step 8. Not that you'd have any choice, you porky legless, hand-shouldered blob. I mean, what are you going to do, chase the person down if they refuse to remove your head?
Step 9. You should have thought of that before you got fat, removed your legs and sewed your hands to your arm sockets.
(NB: Duh! You make me sick!)