May 29, 2007

Frequency of Sex for Various Men with Explanations

1. Hugh Hefner - frequent sex (Explanation: scientists believe Hefner's ability to sustain such frequent sexual behavior at an advanced age may be linked to his presence among many naked, horny, young women looking to form loving and meaningful publicity-based relationships)

2. Bill Gates - infrequent sex (Explanation: starts well, but hard drive slows due to viral infections)

3. Fidel Castro - infrequent sex (Explanation: quite old and in ill-health; he's smoked his last cigar... or something like that)

4. Kim Jong-il - abstinent (Explanation: seems quite active, but upon closer examination, it can be seen that he is only fucking himself)

5. George W. Bush - perpetual sex (Explanation: always screwing the American people; unable to pull out due to lack of exit strategy)

6. Karl Rove - abstinent (Explanation: mercifully, one is not needed)

7. Ann Coulter - very frequent sex (Explanation: professional dominant)



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