Setting: Two chairs.
(Lights up, Tad and Olly sit in chairs, holding the sides of their seats, back to back, center stage)
(They hop, while remaining seated on their chairs, to the sides of the stage, then backwards to the same spot.)
Olly: I win.
(same, Tad makes it back first this time)
Tad: Best out of three?
Olly: Has to be.
Tad: Alright. Go!
(same, they tie)
Olly: Shit, that was a tie, wasn't it?
Tad: Yeah, think so.
Olly: Do over?
Tad: No... too tired, man.
Tad: It wasn't supposed to be an endurance contest, just fun.
Olly: Well, but, neither one of us wins then.
Tad: That's fine.
Olly: Why don't we have a fourth one after we rest a bit.
Tad: Winner take all?
Tad: Sounds good to me.
(Olly hops in his chair)
Olly: Hey, Tad, face me.
Tad: (hopping around) Okay. What?
Olly: Here's the game.
Tad: New game?
Olly: Yeah. New game.
Olly: Okay. Back up a little. Now, we put our feet together. (they adjust until their feet are touching with their legs almost straight in front of them) Now, first one to push the other over wins.
(They struggle for a while, Olly eventually gets pushed over backward)
Tad: Ha! Winner and still champion!
Olly: (still in chair in the same way, but now on his back) Hard to be still champion, if it's the first time we've played.
Tad: Oh, I knw... just an expression.
Olly: Alright. Let's go again.
Olly: Wait, I don't...
Tad: I think I can help you.
(Tad hops toward Olly's head, hooks his feet under Olly's chair back, and lifting with his lower legs, this much exertion, of course, forces Tad's chair to lean back, eventaully they reach a balancing point where Olly is half up and Tad is half down, they balance like this for a while)
Tad: This is tricky.
Olly: What happens if you let go?
Tad: Okay. I'll try leaning forward, you do the same, and then I'll let go.
(they do, both promptly falling backward in their chairs, both now lay on the backs of their chairs, on the floor)
Olly: Welcome to my world.
Tad: That didn't work.
Tad: Now what?
Olly: Well, we keep going. I mean what else to you do... all our stuff's gone, the thieves epoxied us to these chairs. We have to make our own fun.
Tad: I know.
Olly: Eventually, someone will find us.
Olly: (thinking) Hey, how about this, we play... ummm...
Olly: Well.... I'm thinking... thinking. Got it! Do we have a soccer ball?
Olly: Awesome! Because here's what we do, we take the ball...
Tad: (interrupting) In the basement.
Tad: The soccer ball. It's in the basement.
Tad: You know what, though? I'm going to get it! Nothing's gonna stop us from having some fun!
Olly: What if the thieves took it?
Tad: That's a chance I'll have to take.
Olly: You are far braver than I am.
Tad: Ahh... this is about passing time... not letting your circumstances get you down.
Olly: True. Go for it.
(He starts, painfully hopping his chair off stage, lights fading)
Olly: Tad. Basement's the other way.
Tad: I know. I'm looking for my bike helmet first. Hope I left it on the floor.