March 27, 2007

A Play A Day #347

Staying After


Setting: Classroom, Eliot and Sal, both about ten, each cleaning one of two large blackboards

Eliot: Can I use the stool now?

Sal: No. I need it.

E: You're taller than me. I can't reach the top part. (jumping to demonstrate, slapping the wet sponge as high as he can reach each time)

S: I can't really reach either.

E: I can't even come close!

S: You're right. You are short.

E: No, I'm not! I just can't reach. My arms aren't long enough.

S: Cause you're short.

E: No, I'm not!

S: (carrying stool over to him) Here's the stool, poor short baby.

E: Shut up! I'm tall enough!

S: When you're on the stool.

E: I don't need the stool! (kicking it back to Sal)

S: Whatever, little-short-baby-pants.

E: Shut up!

S: (making baby noises, crouching down and jumping ineffectually to mimic Eliot) Unnh... unnhh... unnhhh... waaaaaaa....

E: Why do you always tease me! That's why we have to do this anyway!

S: If you just knew how to take it, and not go crying to Ms. Antonich each time some one looked at you funny, then we wouldn't have to do this at all. You're the real reason we got in trouble.

E: I do not.

S: You're a baby. Now we're in trouble, because you're a baby. Now you're even a bigger baby; because you can't reach the top of the blackboard.

E: You can't reach it either.

S: Yes, I can!

E: Not mine. It's way higher!

S: Nuh-uhh. It's the same!

E: Prove it, if you're so tall.

(Sal starts cleaning the top of Eliot's blackboard)

S: See!

E: I don't believe it!

S: What do you mean? I'm reaching it right now; see?

E: (points to the only remaining unwashed corner) Not that part; I think it's higher over there.

S: No, it's not, stupid! It's the same height!

E: I think the floor's lower though.

S: (cleaning the unwashed corner too) Same height, moron! See!? Same height!

E: Wow! You are tall enough! I was wrong.

S: Figures, you're so stupid, little baby!

E: (finishes last touches of his chalkboard, drops sponge in the bucket) I'm all done.

S: (looking at Eliot's chalkboard) Hey! How did you...

E: This really smart, tall kid did most of the tough parts.

S: You jerk!

E: No, I'm just a baby.

S: You have to do the top part of mine now!

E: Sorry, I can't reach.

S: I'm telling on you when Ms. Antonich comes back!

E: Baby. Waaaaa....

(lights out)


No comments: