Setting: A bed.
Sally: (lying in bed, Tish and Greta sitting on either side of bed, Sally has been crying) You two... I'm so grateful... I can't believe you've come all this way - halfway across the country... Things have been so bad. You two bring me such great hope, but who... who am I kidding, I don't think I can do this.
Tish: Yes, you can, Sally! You've always been the motivating force behind everything we've done. Now, it's your turn. We are here for you.
Greta: We wouldn't have come halfway across the country if it weren't for your encouragement over all these years.
Sally: But you two have that natural ability. I always just reminded you how great you were.
Sally: Right, are.
Greta: We were great, and we still are.
Sally: Of course, of course.
Tish: Of course what?
Greta: Yeah, Sally, why do you have to turn on us?
Sally: Ohh... I wa...
Greta: Subtle little digs at our ability.
Tish: Making us sound like we're past our prime.
Greta: I don't like this.
Tish: Are you trying to tear us down? Now, in your moment of struggle, here we are for you. I mean, we come halfway across the country to help you, and this? This is what we have to put up with?
Greta: This venom from you? We could have just stayed home... back home, halfway across the country, and been treated so much better.
Sally: Tish! Greta! I...
Greta: Well, this is just so typical from you, isn't it?
Tish: All these years. Pretending to support us while we achieved fame and fortune. (breaking down) Helping us out while we realized we were bigger than this place, better than all this. Convincing us that we needed to live our dreams, and live them out, not here... not here... but... but... halfway across the country! And then... then...and then... just when we try to rescue you in your hour of darkness... your hour... we travel back here... across the country... halfway... and step out of all our fame and fortune. A step that is so big... so big! Approximately as big as half the distance across this country!
Sally: But... wait. Hey. (pause) Neither one of you are famous or wealthy.
Greta: I knew that was going to come up.
Tish: Honesty? Is that your new trick?
Sally: No... wait, I mean...
Greta: Arrgghhh! You just don't when to stop; do you, Sally? Attacking your best friends! Attacking us when we are exhausted from dropping everything and hurrying halfway across the country! Attacking us... and with what?! The truth! The sneaky, sneaky truth! How underhanded!
Tish: How conniving!
Greta: How tricky!
Sally: It... it's not a trick... really, I...
Greta: Liar! You're telling the truth, aren't you?!
Sally: Ummm... there's no way for me to answer that.
Tish: Not speaking, huh?
Greta: Convenient for her.
Tish: Yes, unlike us, she has steadfastly not travelled halfway across the country.
Sally: You know, on second thought... I... I think... that I will be able to take care of everything just fine.
Tish: Ohhh... no you don't! You're not backing away from our help now!
Greta: You can't do this yourself. That's why we're here.
Tish: That's what friends are for.
Greta: Please remember how helpless and worthless you are, Sally.
Tish: We've come halfway across the country to start helping you through this crisis.
Greta: After all, you always been there for us.
Tish: Think of all the times you've travelled halfway across the country for Greta or me.
Greta: We really must repay all your kindness.
Tish: It's what friends do.
Greta: Even friends that live half a country away.
Tish: Across which they must travel.
Sally: You know... I forgot how great you two were.
(Tish and Greta lean back quickly, bristling anew)