A Play A Day #1

This. Is. It just is. It is a start. No idea how far it will go. A perpetual motion machine, a safety net, a repository, a weapon of mass extraction. Every day, a new play. Very short, usually. I don't have that much time. Must push button. Must vomit words. Stir them around. Be pretentious, at times. Disarming. Coy. Witty. Gritty. Shitty, too, I'm sure. We'll see. Let's get started.


The 'J's Are Silent


A: I'm not liking this new book.

B: What's wrong?

C: Is that the new Brjezshielojwski?

A: Is that how you pronounce it?

C: Yeah, Bra-sha-loo-ski. The 'J's are silent.

A: Oh, that's the problem...

B: What?

A: The name.

B: The name was the problem? The author's name?

A: Yeah.

C: You said you didn't like the book.

A: Right; I didn't like the author's name. Couldn't pronounce it.

B: O.K. But what's wrong with the book?

A: Nothing. It all makes sense now.

C: The book makes sense?

B: You read it?

A: No, no, not at all.

B: How can it make sense then, if you haven't even read it?

C: The book isn't about the author's last name.

A: No, I mean the fact that it's in Polish.

B: Ohh...

C: I get it.

A: Yeah, really sheds new light on the whole thing for me.

B: So, what's going on tonight?

C: I'm taking my wife to a movie.

B: O.K. What are you up to? Want to play cards or something?

A: Nah, I'm reading this book.

B: You can read Polish?

A: No, but I can pronounce it. The 'J's are silent right?

C: Ummm... maybe sometimes, but it's probably a lot more complicated than that.

A: Yeah, I suppose so...

B: So, cards then?

A: No. I'm definitely reading the book. I've heard it's great.

C: You know, I have the English translation; you could borrow that if...

A: No, no, books lose a lot in translation.

B: Sure, but you can't read Polish, remember.

A: Right, but I figure I can pronounce most of it. The words will do the rest.

B: What do you mean?

A: They'll sink in and sit there.

C: But you won't understand them!

B: You won't get it. You know; why don't we go out to eat?

A: Sure. There's a new Polish restaurant in the lowertown area.

B: Haha. Yes, O.K. I don't know Polish food.

A: Me either, but we can still eat it. The food will do the rest.

C: I get it; I get it.

B: O.K. You win; on metaphorical grounds only.

A: Thanks.

(end)