Tic - not even the fun, involuntary, musculature kind, a 3 x 3 grid of short-lived eternity
So, So Sorry - return to start, return to start, return to start
Chutes - you hurt the cat with the broken cookie jar then threw them both through the hole in the ice to hide the evidence
Othello - try to pretend it's a racially diverse community, keep trying
Checker - you can't lose, you can't win, absolutely no one will king you
Scrabble - all consonants special edition, no anarchic blank tiles
Operation - no touching!
Clue - Jeffrey Dahmer limited set, can you guess who did it?
Twister - for one, otherwise known as better than yoga, but who'll spin the arrow? That's right. Your cat, loser.
Candy Land - because your acid score fell through
Strategergo - ex-Presidents only
Trivial Surrender - no questions, just a board and a white, pie-shaped flag
Decommissioned Battleship - tours at noon and 4 p.m., Mondays and Thursdays only
Life - the board just keeps unfolding