1. Sir Kendrick Worthington Cuthridge, III - He comported himself in a manner most insufferable. Quite.
2. Tallulah Mintz - I had to see if was possible that she could be hotter than she already was. The answer was yes, she could be. Dramatically so.
3. Otto M. O'Layshen - Entirely his fault.
4. Henry DeWitt - Needed to make some campfire S'mores for the other kids. Henry was the closest thing to kindling we could find.
5. The Nikklestet family - More environmentally responsible than burning natural resources to heat my home.
6. Collette Maple-Burns - This was an understandable mistake.
7. Dewey Potter - Don't even pretend you care. No one liked him anyway.
8. George Numann - He dared me to do it by tying himself to the chair next to my matches and that watering can filled with kerosene.
#3 reminds me why I SHOULD NOT READ THIS BLOG AT WORK. The laughter is, uh, hard to snuff out.
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